her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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