Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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