I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
