he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
