We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
