I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
It's official drugs can't kill me
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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