R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
