the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
