I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
this will be a night to untag.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
