There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Randomize
