his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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