I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
So apparently I’m into choking now
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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