Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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