Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
