Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
