this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize