i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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