is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
