But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
