It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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