i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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