Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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