Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
