A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
True but thats because hes a fetus.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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