I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize