My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
