Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
