is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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