Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
