She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
