Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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