Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
