she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize