They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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