he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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