But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Randomize
