TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
