Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
