She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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