So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
