just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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