at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I just want to make out with him forever
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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