Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
