R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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