question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
