weddingsv make me drug and hornr
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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