Everything about him screamed your future.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize