Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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