Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
