Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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