yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
This baby is an asshole
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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